Truth

“Sarah!” Ramona screamed, as her friend fell to the floor.  She jumped from her seat and rushed to Sarah’s side. Ramona shook her, but Sarah would not wake. 

“Mrs. Wheeling!” Ramona shouted, and the stout housekeeper rushed into the room.

“Oh dear! What happened? “

“She fainted! Mrs. Wheeling do you have any smelling salts?”

“Yes, I will be back soon.” And she waddled, quickly from the room.  Despite the housekeeper’s old age, she returned to the parlor in record time. Ramona raised Sarah’s head and Mrs. Wheeling held the bottle of smelling salts under Sarah’s nose.

Gasping, Sarah awoke.

“What happened?” she asked, her voice faint.

“You fainted dear” Mrs. Wheeling replied. Sarah’s blue eyes blinked quickly, as if she were trying to process it all.

Slowly they helped her sit up. Sarah’s brown hair was beginning to tumble down her back, giving her a wild look.

“Is there anything we can get you?” Ramona asked.

“Some wine would be nice”

Mrs. Wheeling nodded and looked at Ramona.

 “I’ll stay with her, you go on.”  And the housekeeper left the room. 

Ramona looked at Sarah. Never in her life had she seen her friend so pale.

“Sarah what happened? We were talking and all of the sudden you hit the floor!”

Sarah was staring ahead, not even blinking.

“I have to go.” She said finally.

“Go, go where?”

Ramona heard indistinct mumbles picking out the words “my train” and “can’t stay.”

“Well you can stay, and you will stay! You just fainted and are in no state to travel.”

Sarah looked back at Ramon, a little color rising to her cheeks.

“You cannot tell me what to do in my own house!” Sarah stated, almost shrilly.

Ramona’s eyebrows flew to her hairline. “Oh, and when have you ever cared about the rules of society?”

Sarah’s brow wrinkled at this retort. Ramona knew that her friend was not used to taking orders from anyone.

“I have to go” Sarah now said, as firmly as she could.

Finally it dawned on Ramona what was going on “Sarah, what are you running from?”

Sarah looked at her, really looked at her, as if she were seeing Ramona for the first time.

“I don’t know what you are talking about”

“Oh don’t play coy with me Miss Turner. You run. It is what you do.” Ramona was astounded that it had never occurred to her before now, and she could feel the acid in her tone.

Sarah was now getting to her feet shakily; Ramona could tell she was angry.

“What are you running from?” Ramona was pleading now.

“Nothing of your concern.” Sarah replied sharply.

“Nothing of my concern? I am your friend! Of course it is my concern! Tell me what is wrong.”

Sarah was swaying a little, and Ramona caught her before she fell again. Holding tight to her friend, Ramona lead Sarah to one of the plump green chairs.  Sarah sat down slowly, holding her head. If Ramona had not seen Sarah’s lips moving, she would never have guessed that she spoke the words that escaped her lips.

“Timothy proposed.”

Ramona looked down at Sarah, her eyes wide.

“What?” she whispered.

“He proposed to me.”

Ramona crouched down next to the chair that her friend occupied. In truth she had been expecting this for some time now. Anyone who had seen Timmy with Sarah could tell that he was madly in love with her. It was only Sarah who pretended not to see. 

“So…” Ramona said, not sure what to say next. She did not think an “I told you so” would be proper.

“So I cannot marry him” Sarah said, and Ramona heard her voice quiver for a moment. It was odd to hear emotion like that in Sarah’s voice. Usually it was Ramona who got emotional.

“Why not?” she asked, guessing what the reply would be.

“Because I do not deserve him. He deserves someone better…”

“Oh Sarah…” Ramona sighed. For how anti-society Sarah was, she could keep secrets as well as any wealthy woman in Boston. Sarah may not have taken to curtsies or dancing at cotillion, but she had mastered the art of secrecy.

Ramona looked up at her friend, and searched her blue eyes for some form of the truth. But the blue eyes were blank and guarded.

“Sarah, you can tell me anything. You know that… don’t you?”

Sarah nodded in reply, but looked away.  Ramona was becoming furious. She hated when Sarah did this! All the secrets, it had to stop.

“Damn it Sarah, Tell me! What are you trying so hard to hide? What!?”

Sarah’s eyes widened again, her mouth hanging open a little. Ramona knew she was stunned that Ramona had cursed and yelled at her. Rarely did she ever loose her temper, but she had to do something to get Sarah’s attention, and it had worked.

 A moment passed before Sarah finally spoke.

“I have been with a man, Mona.”

Ramona closed her eyes, and she felt as if a knife had been stabbed into her belly.

“Meaning?”

Sarah looked at her with a look that said “Do I have to spell it out to you?”  And Ramona blushed.

“Oh…” she said in a small voice. She had not been expecting that, but Ramona had a dark feeling that it was about to get worse. This was just the tip of the ice burg.

“It was a man at school…  A man, whom you now have a connection with.” Ramona inhaled swiftly. They were getting to it now, the deep dark secret Sarah had been hiding.

“Would that man happen to be named Eric?” She asked, even though she knew the answer already. Sarah swallowed hard then she nodded.

Ramona could barley think. How could this have happened? How in the world could this have happened? How could Ramona be falling in love with Stephen, and Sarah and Eric? But she shook the thought from her head. Her mind was too pure to think those kinds of things. She could not even wrap her mind around the very thought of it.  She had to speak before her thoughts tumbled out of control.

“So you are leaving because of all of this?”

Sarah nodded again “What choice do I have?”

“What do you mean what choice do you have? You can stay here! No one need know about any of this.”

Sarah’s blue eyes met Ramona’s, they had a pitying look in them.

“Oh Mona. I wish I could have you innocence, but soon everyone will know my secret and I cannot stay and subject my parents to my shame.”

“But how will anyone know your secret? I mean who has cause to tell?”

Sarah was biting her lip, and Ramona could tell she was contemplating what to tell her next.

“You see Mona, it wont be easy for me to keep this kind of secret… You see it is one that will begin to show.”

The knife was stabbing Ramona in the stomach again. She had not heard right. No it could not be. Not that! Sarah stood up again, while Ramona was still sitting next to the green chair, to stunned to move.

“I have to go…”

Ramona looked up at her friend, and noticed that there were tears in the blue eyes.  Ramona got to her feet too.

“Where will you go?”

Sarah looked away.

“Please tell me! I swear I will not tell a living soul!”

“Maine.” And Sarah rummaged in her bag, pulling out a piece of paper with scribbles on it.

“This is the address. Mona, swear you will not tell anyone, especially Stephen. This is for your eyes only.”

Ramona took the paper and stuffed it in her pocket. Tears were now leaking down her face. She had lost her mother, her fiancé, and now her dearest friend just months apart. She could not bear it if Sarah left, but she knew there was no stopping her.

“Sarah, please be safe.”  And with those words Sarah walked over to Ramona and hugged her tight. 

“Goodbye, Mona” She said. And with that Sarah gathered her bag, and left the room before Ramona could finish blinking.